28122012

Few days until new year. 

I am supposed to be back at Labuan today but due to few family reasons, I have to stay and will only be back at Labuan on 1st January. I don't know whether I should be happy or not. Exams is few days left too and I haven't even start my revision yet. I am soooo dead meat!!! 

Okeh, enough with that. Goshh, life is upside down for me right know, seems like I have lost in my own world. It's like I am not me anymore. I don't know, is it an exam fever or what. How come I totally forgot about my own dreams and goal. I know I'll get distracted by the 'distract er' but still I let myself in, allowing myself to be distracted. This sound crazy, I know. But this is the reality of me right now. I started to hide things from the one I loves,my family and you (you know who you are), trying to settle down all things by myself even I know that I can't, abandoning my responsibilities when I know I should not. Soo not juji!! Hate this side of mine.  Love life, be grateful  Love life, be grateful. Love life, be grateful. I'm talking this to myself again and again and again.

 Please come back to your sense juji! 

grabbed this from FB.

Dear God, thank you for never giving up on me. Awaken me from all of this. Let Your will be done in my life and I surrender all to You Lord. Amen.

“Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.” (Ephesians 5:14 NIV)

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Merry Christmas.

Back to hometown on last Friday. Weeeeeeeeee....!! Feels so good to be home. hehe. Spending quality time with my dear family, celebrating Christmas at church, eating non-stop. haha. That's the point. I'm forever grateful and truly blessed. Have a blessed Christmas everyone and Happy New Year 2013 in advance. 

Remember, life is a blessing! 

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relationship.

"A relationship without a trust is like a car without a gas, you can stay in it as long as you want but it won't go anywhere. "

Found this random quotes from Google and I realize it was soo true. Almost 1 year since that things happen, giving you another chance, the 1 year agreement to build the trust between us back. I can see the effort that you did to make me trust you again and I really really appreciate it. Trying my very best to trust you back and I realize I can't.  The pain is not there anymore but the wound is still there. We can easily forgive but to forget it is impossible. It's not like I am still living in my pass, I have move on but i still can't trust you back. All I want now is a time for myself. I do love you, will always love, but love only is not enough for us to carry on this relationship. I do hope you'll respect my decision. Pray, pray and pray. Who knows what God's has planned for us in the future. :'(

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hellooo weekend!

Hello bloggers, how are you guys? I didn't even realize it's weekend already. Yeay! Counting days to go back home for Christmas. But before that I have to focus on things that I've to do on next two week.It's a presentation weeks,huhhh; Fyp 1, web programming, SAAD and MIS. Wish me luck!

Hmm, thanks God the "case" have been solved in a good way. I am officially, legally own the room I've been staying until now. The power of prayer, do believe in that. He'll give every things that we need :)

I'll give you guys a point to ponder tonight. Christmas, what is the meaning of Christmas for you? My bestie' asked me to listen to this song. The lyrics do touched my heart, miss Your presence oh Lord. 

Be blessed :)

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unexpected December.

It's December! Whoaa the time is flying so fast i guess. Christmas mode activated. Well, through all the excitements and hopes for this coming December, I really really didn't expect that something will came out and ruined the whole mood of mine. Almost 3 years here in Umskal, I didn't even think that I'll got problems with the hostel administration.

 I just can't cope with a close-minded person. Seriously! This post might be a sensitive issues but just let me express myself here. Well, there is 4 persons staying in our dorm. Our dorm look like an apartment since we have 3 rooms, a toilet, kitchen, living room and so on. Me, my roommates, one Chinese girl from KL, and also a Malay girl from somewhere in Peninsular. This Malay girl, report us to the student council that we brings pork in the dorm. She said she saw the tin inside the dustbin. The students council visited us and report it directly to the hostel administration. And I'm like $#$@%^&%%#@$#&^&!!! 

We did bring it long time before, but on that day we're busted, it was the Chinese girl actually, she did admit to us but did not admit to the student council. We can't put all the blame on her since she is a junior. Another thing is, because of this case, the hostel administration found out that I switched room with my friend. So, double trouble for me. For this one, I didn't want to put the blame on anyone since it was my own fault for switching illegally. Humbly, I accept that one. But for the pork case, I really can't tolerate with! 

Hellooooo, other students bring it too FYI. We eat it secretly in our own room, we use our own eating tools, we don't even share spoon, plate or anythings. But if you are not comfortable with that, you can always discuss with us first,  negotiate with us first. Not directly report us to them. We can always settle this by our own first. Girl, you are in a 3rd year, same like me. Don't you even know how serious it could be if you report it to the administration? You have no idea what the three of us facing on right now. Being scolded by the "madam" yesterday, and I don't know what's next. 

The girl that report us, don't even dare to look at us now, staying in her own room for all days and night. I know you are afraid of us now. Dare to report us but didn't dare to speak directly to us. Seriously, what kind of person are you girl? 

I always respect others people religion, belief and culture. In the same time i really do hope that they'll respect mine too. Peace no war! 

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preparation

SIBBL pre-Christmas will be held on 24th-25th of November. Took some pictures during the preparations. Enjoy!

swollen eyes =.='

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Another blog Update.

Hello bloggers, how are you guys? Hoping that all is well for you all. 

Finished the FYP phase 3 presentation today. The interface and prototype of our system. Thanks God everything went well. Just few comments from the consultant to make it much better. Tons of assignments and reports waiting for me. Huhh, you can do it juji! 

im using the mockup builder for the interface. 

For the church ministry, been busy rehearsal-ing for the pre-christmas and caroling. For the first time ever, I've join the caroling's team here in SIBBL. Christmas mode activated! And now I'm thinking about my christmas's wish, all I want for christmas is/are ________ ngehehe :p

bestie. intoducting you my fyp's partner-esther.

Rainy Labuan, better sleep early tonight. Good night everyone! 

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mock interview.

It's tommorow!!

Well, its a mock only. But yet, it cost me lots of mark for my soft skills courses which are compulsory for the final year student. Huarrggghh, nervous like there is no tomorrow! My last interview was almost 3 years ago.haha. Okey, okey, relax juji. Breath in, breath out. Everything will be just fine. 

Ignore the handwriting. Can't believe I've study this much for the past 2 years and half =.='

Have faith.

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You shoot me down but I won't fall.I am titanium.

Loveeee this song, Loveeee Madilyn Bailey :)

You shout it out,

But I can't hear a word you say

I'm talking loud not saying much

I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet

You shoot me down, but I get up

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose

Fire away, fire away

Ricochet, you take your aim

Fire away, fire away

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

Cut me down

But it's you who'll have further to fall

Ghost town and haunted love

Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones

I'm talking loud not saying much

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose

Fire away, fire away

Ricochet, you take your aim

Fire away, fire away

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

I am titanium

I am titanium

Stone-hard, machine gun

Fired at the ones who run

Stone-hard as bulletproof glass

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

You shoot me down but I won't fall

I am titanium

I am titanium

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Got ya!

Got ya! Wewww, that's the feeling when someone discover the place you've been hiding for a veryyy long time. I've been discovered. Ohh my, but no worries, there's nothing to be afraid to. Somehow, I am grateful you've discover it. *wink* :p

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Well, here I am, back to Labuan. The mid-sem break hasn't fully over but I came back early to campus on purpose. Assignments berlambak! And still got 1 more paper left for mid-term. And also the FYP. Huhhh, all the best juji! 

R.E.S.T.O.R.A.T.I.O.N

Dear God, I claimed Your promises for me, my family and for all of us. Amen. 

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#unreasonable

hostel

Conflict emotion. Rainy Labuan. Assignments. Depress. Home is where my heart and mind is. Trust issues. Missing. Frustrating. 

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I just don't understand.

I just don't understand. Call me immature, nerd or very schematic people or whatever, I don't care. I just don't get it. People outside there trying their best to seek an opportunity to go to church, to take part in the ministry even they were struggling with their works, studies and so on . But you??!! Urghhh, I'm so damn angry, When you got the chance, you just blowing it away. Can you just be grateful for the chances that you got? Appreciate it since I know you are too busy with your other commitments. But, hanging out with your friends is more important that that i guess. I keep my mouth shut, I don't want to judge anyone, I think I've speak enough about this before. You got your brain and mind. Yaa, I am so damn angry, but deep in my heart there is a sorrow there. I guess I can only pray for you. I sorry. :'( 

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to. (Matt 6:33)

#posting this not because I'm perfect and very holistic person, I just need a place to voice out my feelings#

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Ohhh i miss blogging,huhu. And finally got a chance to write on something here. Actually there are stills load of things to do, but let me rest for a bit while updating my blog.ngehehe :p So, this is how a final year student life would be. The busiest, hectic campus life ever! *sigh. But i'll always be grateful for everything. Using my own strength to carry on this definitely would not never work. Lean on God for every single things will keep you calm and in track. Believe me! Beside, a positive mindset is also the main key. Motivating yourself by your own. I'm not gonna lie, of course the pressure and stress are still there, pimples here and there, hair falls and so on but you'll be OK and just fine. :)

Student ministry, youth ministry, dance ministry, PPK ministry - i'm forever grateful. SIBBWPL is growing and growing! Can wait for the coming church anniversary.

Today, finish our e-community project. Its our LI 1 actually. I don't think I can write the whole story one by one but let te pictures tell you the story. Thanks God everything went well. Thanks SKK St Anne, thanks to our supervisor and last  but not least to my team members a.k.a girlfriends, deffy, lala and lyn. Great job girls! I might be lost my temper sometimes, but still I love you girls! Muahhhxxxx xoxo. hehe :P

basically this is what we are doing :)

peace :)

us

adorable kids.

giving the gift from us to pk hem

with pk hem and cikgu laura

10/10/2012

"We are running, chasing after all that You are, We are running, cause all that You are is all that we want now! No matter what the cost, we give it all to go Your way!"

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El Shaddai

Haven't sleep properly for the past few days due to FYP matters and other task. Phase 1 consultation on this  coming Monday, Ohh my.. :-S 

I've listen to this old song just now, El shaddai by Amy Grant which means God Almighty. Truly blessed!

"Age to age You are still the same by the power the Name."

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Went to PPP prayer meeting yesterday. 

#The Power of prayer#

I miss having a fellowship with them. I miss having a deep relationship with Him, The Creator. Forgive me Lord for being such unfaithful child of Yours. Lead my way, let me walk in Your will and plans. Amen. 

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blog update.

Hello bloggers. Rarely update my blog nowadays. Huh, lot of things for me to catch up. Wait 'till I got free time, I'll post everything. I mean when I really free :p

 Almost 1.00am, still awake and I miss blogging. I have no idea what to write on, so let the pictures tell us the story :)

Latest pic of mine, cute puppy but very "galangas!" :D

Will do our E-community program in this school as part of our LI 1. Wish me luck!

pic from FB.

The last picture was posted by one of our church member, I am truly blessed. Isn't that words have a deep meaning? "God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the CALLED!". When they choose me to be the next leader of our christian student fellowship, I doubt myself whether I can do it or not. I can't even lead myself, so how can I lead others? I am nobody, I am not qualified to lead them and many other bad thoughts came into my mind. ~.~ Went to PPP gathering at church last Tuesday and the sermon on that day really knock all the bad thoughts away, God said we are more than a winner! Yeah, so I am ready to serve! I believe He CALLED me on purpose and He'll qualifies me. Amen! 

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:)

Back to Labuan.

New semester. New hostel. New roommate. New environment. 

With the same spirit, goal and hope. Final year, here I come!

Wish me luck dear bloggers! 

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Revelation 14 : 13

Revelation 14 : 13

Then I heard a voice from heaven say, "Write: Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on." "Yes," says the Spirit, "they will rest from their labor, for their deeds will follow them."

took this pic early of the year at Labuan. 

took this yesterday-around my late granny house

in front late granny house.

Every things  on earth has it times, same goes to us. Rest in peace granny. Gonna miss you. 

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My very 1st try.

Tadaaaaaaaaa!!!

this is jico :)

this is my lil bro, nanak :)

Abin.

jujie.

I guess i really don't have any talent in photography, miahahahaha. But I'm ready to learn. It's really good things to do when you have a free time. I have no idea to snap what kind of picture so I end up capturing my siblings and me.hahaha xD

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blog update ~.~

• Hello bloggers.
• Done with the conference..! Lots of blessings indeed. "Be an impact to all people around you, wherever you are. Be the light!" 
• Whoaa, lots of things happened but I thinks it's so much better for me to keep it inside for some moment. Coincidence? I don't know whether I should trust that word or not but one thing that I do really have faith on, God's plan is beautiful and wonderful in His way :) So, rest in His love. FAITH-HOPE-LOVE. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me-Phil 4:13"
• Maybe it's not too late to wish Selamat Hari Raya for those who celebrating it. Huu, too bad I can't attend any of my friends open-houses this year. Millions of sorry ya ^^
• Blog update end :) 'till next time.

loveee this pic so much! credit to ogou^^

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gonna miss them.

gonna miss them :(

me and them :)

Yesterday was my last day teaching them. Being their tutor for about 1 month really brighten my holidays this time. Chetty, Egy, Priscella, Petronela, Ivy, Michelle, Filcheny, Sheryna and Asyraf, wish you all the best! Too bad I only managed to took pictures from 4 of them. 'Till then bloggers :)

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get ready then.

Uhh, the schedule for next semester have been released yesterday. I think we should make an extra effort to deal with them, prepare mentally and physically. Huhhh..dear course-mate, you know what i mean. (The lecturers,haha!) 

I feel that next semester will be very tough and challenging. The fyp as long as the subjects that we have to deal with. Huaaa, wish all of us the best. 

credit to mateen for this, ngehh :p

Looks like we have to take only 4 subjects on next semester, but isn't it supposed to be 5? =.=

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You in Me.

Juwita Suwito - You In Me

Everytime I look into Your eyes 
There's a pleasant surprise awaiting me and amazing me 
Somehow I realize I'm so tired of the lies they keep telling me 
Telling me I should look down inside in myself to find something greater 
When I know I can look at the bright sight and find the Creator 

I just need to spend one moment with You 
Somehow it's a brand new world I'm passing through 
You lift me higher, You let me see 
Over the walls that surrounded me 
Don't need to prove myself, just need to show and tell 
It's You in me 

The other day a wolf in sheep in disguise 
Told me goodness would buy a day or two for me in Paradise 
I could never pay the price, not with a million lives 

But it' d done for me 
Why should I just depend on myself and pretend I'll find something greater 
When I know I can look at the bright side and find the Creator

be blessed :)

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Seems like I can't run away. I am completely stuck between the family, i mean both parties and here i am ignoring my own feeling while everyone else is doing a hip hip hoooray! Wish somebody would kidnaps me away from all of this.huahuahua. Looks like I'm just gonna follow the flow. Save me people! 

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2NE1

Hello bloggers.

Celebrated my birthday few days ago. Just a small event with family & friends. Officially 2NE1. haha :P

Thanks God for the unstoppable, uncountable blessings in my life.

around the party :)

21st and hot! Haha just kidding :p

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sandakan.

Hello dear bloggers! Last weekend, went to Sandakan. Visiting my cousins there as well as mansau-ansau there. Miahahaha~~ I've been planning to go there from last year and FINALLY my wish came true. 4 days and 3 nights, my cousins treating me lots of super duper yummy foods. Steamboat-ing, walk around the town, shopping and so on :)

steamboat-ing :)

with my cousin, rita. after a month at home, i think you can tell the difference of me..miahahaha :p

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teaching & learning

One of the survivors told us about this, then send our name to the teacher in charge, however only 2 of us managed to get it. Huhu, thought we can hang out together while teaching but guess it's not happen like what we've planned. No worries, we can always hang out together,anywhere, anytime, am i right Survivors? 

Officially become a tutor in my former high school, Smk Lohan! Yeahhh...thank you Lord for answering my prayer. Even it just a part time but I am extremely happy! Hehe :)

But I realize that this is not a joke, the principle directly told us, " It's not about the salary that you'll get but  its how you'll help the student to improve their studies, help them. They are your younger sisters and brothers. Don't just think about the wages."  His word went directly into my heart. :)

. For this time being, there are 9 students that is under me. The students willing to sacrifice their time, energy and money for this extra classes for the sake of their studies. Will give my best effort to help them! 

All the best jujie!

love this pictures!

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Lazy.

Didn't realize that it's been 2 weeks since I'm home. The time flying so fast I guess. Hee, due to the non-stop activities at church and kampung make me didn't realize it. Hmm, eating non-stop at home, wake up late everyday. I mean really late! Huh, what kind of sumamdak is  me aahh. I just don't feel like doing anything (suddenly the lazy song cross in my mind). Yeah, I'm too lazy here. 

My all time friend, E called last night, the almost 1 hour conversation really brighten my day I guess. Thank you Lord for giving me friends that always be there for me. The survivors of course! Missing all of them so much!

 Hmm, what do you think when Jujie become a tutor? haha ;) 

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Hillsong Conference 2012

 They are streaming it live right now and I'm watching it!  The sermon, talk, concert and so on. 

This is the link http://backstage.hillsongconference.com/ 

From the link you'll be able to see the schedule on when they'll streaming live.
Be blessed!

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post update.

It's been 6 days since I've been home. Spending quality time with my family and friends is the best thing ever!   They were my strength to move on my life. Ngehh, enough with the heart-broken story. 

this is nanak, my lil bro :)

Uhh, got my first baby last night. It was an unexpected gift from my cousin, sis Eyan. Yeah, when talking about her, it must be something related to photography kan..? Hihi, I'm super duper excited to use it! 

Hangout with my besties yesterday, we were busy chit-chat-ing 'til I forgot to buy the things that I supposed to buy. Haha! Biasalah tu kalau suda jumpa kawan :p

only 4 of us can make it yesterday^^

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today should be the day.

25th June 2012.

Today supposed to be our 3rd anniversary. But I guess some people is not meant to be. It's complicated. No worries jujie, you'll be okay :')

pic from fb.

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It's good to be home.

Hello bloggers, long time no see :p

Hometown, is where I am now. It feels so good to be home, away from those hectic campus life. The exam? Uhh, I've try my very best though I am not in a good condition (emotionally) during the weeks of exam. Somehow, I managed to go through to it, thanks Lord! I've been planning to do a part time job during this holidays but still waiting green light from dad. Hopefully, I'll get his permission.

Meet my sister, eyan today at church. Ohh miss her so much! Thanks for listening my story sis ^^

sis eyan n me.

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conflict emotion again.

picture from mr.google

When the person that you love cheat on you over and over. 

 

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late nite post.

edited picture :p

Hello bloggers. Its 8 of June already and I'm counting days to go back home instead of finishing the exam. Its 12.38 am right now, haven't finish dealing with Discrete Maths, and here I am lost concentration already. Haihh, too many things running in my head.  =.= !!

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Preparing for the last battle.

When everyone else only have 1 week to prepare for the exam, the member of our course should be grateful for being given another extra 1 week. After all the events, assignments, presentations and so on, here I am suffering flu and migraine. All I want is to get better as soon as possible. So that I can focus on the exam's preparation as well as the SSIL Vintage Night on this coming Saturday (I'm part of the management team). Last event on this sem.

#i.miss.home.mum.dad.nanak.jiku.kalabin.#

 Immanuel bloggers!

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always in our mind, farewell seniors!

 

Last Saturday, we've done the Christian Students Fellowship (SIB) of Umskal Farewell Dinner Party 2012 at Waterfront Hotel Labuan. It was awesome! With the dresses, heels, hairs, make-up, foods and so on. But the most important thing are we can spent our time happily and share the blessings together. It's normal for any event to have problems or people who can't give their full commitment to make sure the event runs smoothly. For those who has given their all for this event, thank you so much and for those who did not, please, please and please give your full commitment next time. Please manage your TIME wisely next time. Really, really hope it won't happen again next time :) 

(saya menegur karena saya mengasihi)

Represented the 2nd and 1st year students to deliver speech on that night. Just a short one, I know all of them are super hungry.hahah! Before the event start, I can't hold my tears, I don't know why. I can't believe that the event would start in anytime, to think that our crazy friendly, super sporting and kind seniors will leave us in any moment. For us, they are our role model, they are our strength. To see their commitment towards their study but in the same time protecting their relationship with God and spirituality matured is a beautiful thing to see. I am fully blessed. Thanks God, I managed to control my emotion during delivering the speech.heee :p

I haven't got all of the pictures, just few of it. 

 

tadaaaa!!!

ngehhhh :p

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haircut =.=

mode: boring =.=

Yes, I've cut my hairs yesterday.weeeeee~~

a little bit short and the curly hairs almost gone.huhu.what to do.

pls don't mind the tired+swollen eyes.

0key, 1 presentation and 2 more assignments to go then I'm freeeeee!

Wish me luck for this afternoon presentation, i heard those scary panels will come, hope they won't make it.muahahaha.just kidding :p

have a nice day bloggers.

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selca II

I can't sleep. So, here i go, self camera again. =.=

gained weight? yes, i am. thank you.

okey, random post again. hmm few weeks ago, I found this meaningful words while facebook-ing.

"Berdoa untuk menang itu biasa, tapi berdoa untuk dapat mengerti kehendakNya saat kita kalah itulah iman yang teguh!"

deep meaning right? be blessed dear bloggers :)

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Monday blues

source: Google.

Okey, why suddenly Monday blues? cause today i woke up at 11.00 am. what?? yes, 11.00 am. After taking bath and so on, then I filled my empty stomach with rice, fried chicken+mayonnaise, vegetables and 'tuhau'. Sound appetizing right? muahahaha xD Okey, after that..online-ing, online-ing, online-ing 'till 2.30 pm. Then, guess what? sleeping again. And just woke up again at 5.00 pm. Hemp! That's why I called it Monday blues. I am not doing anything instead of sleeping, eating, online-ing. Yes, I am sooo LAZY today! I don't care about the assignments and final exam!

Suddenly I miss playing the ukulele, guitar and keyboard at home. For the ukulele, I'll play speak now by Taylor Swift, for the keyboard I'll play tak mustahil bagiMu by Adelia Lukmana ft Sidney Mohede and for the guitar I'll play any random song that will came out from my mind. ARGHHHH!! I think I miss home. Lots!

Recently, i also tend to forget people. How come I did not remember my ex-classmate in form 4 and 5. After almost 1 year, I just know that he is schooling here in umskal. He is my junior actually. I meet him like more than 10 times. When he smile to me, I look on the other side or make a blur face because seriously I don't remember him! In my mind, why this junior always smiling at me (perasaan lah tu). =.=

Ahhh, what kind of symptom is this??!! Am I old enough to forget a person or I am too stress here? Somebody, help me!!!

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It's been few days since the weather in Labuan is hot. I mean really hot! Ohh, I can't stand it. I just miss the fresh air in my hometown. I can't focus on anything with this stuffy weather. Since my class have been canceled today, I just want to stay at home and settle down all those pending assignments. 

But with this weather?

Haven't fully recover back + stuffy weather; I need my energy back!!

 

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to-do list.

• Business Management & Topics and Current Issues presentation & reports
• Mandarin and E-com Business Model reports
• FYP pre-proposal
• SSIL Vintage Nite
• PPK SIB farewell party
• Final Exam preparation (4 weeks left) 

huh, lots of things to do, isn't it?  final exam is coming soon and i am so not satisfy with the timetable. First week, no paper at all. Second week, 2 paper only. Third week, straight 4 killer paper! And I'm like #@$$%^%^$&*)()(&%##!#@$##!!!!!

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beautiful.

My friend Deffy, took these pictures few days ago during her journey from Labuan to Menumbok. Beautiful!! Isn't it?

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